Looking to purchase the best gay sex toys?
Our gay sex toy guide features interviews with a leading LGBT sex therapist and staff at Canada’s largest adult fun store.
You’ll learn about the top selling and trendiest sex toys for men on the market today. We’ll also give you insight into how sex toys for gay men can be a perfectly safe and pleasurable way to enjoy a healthy sex life whether you’re single and living alone or partnered.
We also share a list of popular gay sex toys including Fleshjack, vibrating masturbators, cock rings, prostate stimulators and water based lubricants.
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History of Gay Sex Toys
Sex toys have likely existed since the dawn of man, as both men and women found everyday objects that helped them find pleasure and sexual satisfaction.
By researching the history of gay sex toys archeologists have found a 2,000 year old bronze dildo with a ring attached to it (strap on?) It was found in the tomb of a Chinese aristocrat in Jiangsu province. A jade and bronze butt plug was also discovered in the tomb of a king near modern day Shanghai. It seems as though the ancients considered sex toys to be an art form.
In ancient Greece, locals created dildos out of old bread. The population back then didn’t identify as heterosexual, homosexual or bisexual – they just indulged in whatever pleasure felt right. Bread dildos were used by men and women as a biodegradable sexual aid.
In 1869 the steam-powered Manipulator was introduced as the first hand-crank vibrator, created years before electricity! American physician George Taylor invented the unique design, which consisted of a dildo attached to a steam engine that produced vibrations. The goal back in those days was to help alleviate “hysteria in women.” The use of the device is well documented in the film Hysteria starring actress Maggie Gyllenhaal.
The first electrical vibrator arrived in the 1920s and was called the Polar Cub Electric Vibrator. The product boasted a textured knob to provide different pleasurable sensations.
The Oster Stim-U-Lax for Barbers also arrived in the 40s, a vibrating device you strapped onto the back of your hand to deliver powerful sensations. While it was marketed to barbers it quickly became one of the most popular hush-hush sex toys for men.
Jump to the 1970s and Japan dazzles the world with the Hitachi Magic Wand, known as the Cadillac of Vibrators. American sex educator Betty Dodson publicly sang the praises of the revolutionary new toy, launching vibrators into the sex aid mainstream.
Gay sex toys weren’t really marketed until the 1980s and even then they were as taboo as being an out and proud homosexual. The popular Netflix documentary Circus of Books offers fascinating insight into how gay sex toys were sold in Los Angeles throughout the gay liberation movement and into the modern day.
Once gay men began to find liberation in their everyday political lives (passing of gay marriage laws, gay adoption rights etc…) adult shops from Dresden to Miami and Malaga to Puerto Vallarta began to see a boom in the demand for gay sex toys.
How To Enjoy Safe Pandemic Pleasure
Since the pandemic swept across the globe many gay men have struggled with how to create new safe boundaries around their intimate experiences. It’s been a particularly challenging time for single gay men, who are reporting higher levels of stress and feelings of loneliness.
Dobbernationloves chatted with Dr. Reece Malone, a certified sex therapist, sex coach and sexuality educator based in Winnipeg, Manitoba.
Malone works with individuals, couples and diverse relationships. Before opening his private practice, he began his career as a sexuality educator and workshop facilitator at two different 2SLGBTQ+ organizations.
Malone’s experiences include being on the board of a local gay men’s sexual health clinic, participating in gay men’s health think tanks, and helping in the development of two trans health clinics. He also trains clinical professionals on topics related to sexual orientation, gender identity, and homo and queer eroticism.
Malone shared, “The pandemic has affected our dating and our sexual culture. Negotiating sex now includes screening questions on Covid-19 exposure and risk, and it has amplified anxieties with socially interacting. That being said, gay men are resilient and adaptable.”
Malone added, “Many gay men have shared with me that the topic of coronavirus helped them to unlock and broaden conversations, and have inspired more creative ideas on dating and hooking up. I often share that if you choose to pause onsite dating and hooking up, solo sex, virtual sex and online dating doesn’t need to stop. This is also an opportunity for sexual self-exploration so why not take this time to reflect and take inventory on your sexuality including your curiosities, boundaries and turn-ons.”
A study conducted in 2008 surveyed 1047 men in America indicated that 44.8% of men incorporated a sex toy into their sexual activities. Of the men who used vibrators, they were more likely to report sexual health promoting behaviours and have greater erectile function, intercourse satisfaction and sexual desire.
Malone explained, “Within my work with gay, bi and queer men, there is a positive correlation between the incorporation of gay sex toys with being open to new erotic and arousal experiences, positive body image and sexual satisfaction.”
Sex Coach Recommends Use of Gay Sex Toys
So what gay sex toys does Malone suggest single men and queer couples explore?
Malone added, “For gay clients with diverse bodies and turn ons, there’s an array of toys and sexual pleasure enhancers. From vibrators to dildos, from sucking devices to prostate massagers, there are so many options available. Many adult shops offer roadside pickup or have re-opened their doors so guys can look, touch and feel what’s available.”
Malone explained, “The great thing about sex toys and enhancers is that when incorporated into self-pleasuring, it can help alleviate the pressures and performance anxieties of sex with others. These anxieties can affect our ability to stay present and in the moment which can as a result negatively affect erection and orgasm quality.”
For many men, the thought of being alone can amplify negative and critical self-messages. The impacts of the pandemic on our ability to socialize, date, and hook up can amplify these worries and anxieties.
Malone concluded, “It’s important to remind ourselves that as we’re figuring out our new interpersonal norms and as medical treatment and technology is emerging, that we’re not in a forever scenario. We still have choices regarding how we meet others, we can choose to engage in pleasurable solo sex, we have the ability to be creative regarding intimacy and eroticism, and we can still connect with others while being risk aware. If the anxieties and worries are negatively impacting your mental health, I invite guys to reach out to a mental health provider, counsellor or therapist for additional support.”
Best Gay Sex Toys at Stag Shop
Stag Shop was launched by the Horea family with it’s first Waterloo location in 1972. Since then, the popular Canadian adult fun store has grown into 27 locations including locations in Toronto, Barrie, Guelph, Hamilton, London, Niagara and Ottawa.
Sarah Goertzen, Marketing Director at Stag Shop shared what trends she’s seeing in the gay sex toy industry, “Technology has really started to play a bigger part in gay sex toys. Over the last few years we have seen toys that are smarter, stronger and more innovative. They include more powerful motors, are app controllable and feature Artificial Intelligence software to create unique and customizable pleasure experiences. People want the best of the best so we are seeing a trend in higher end toys.”
Fleshjack
Fleshlight was founded by Steve Shubin and his wife Kathy in 1995 in California. At the time, Fleshlight’s target market was primarily straight men, so in 2007, the Fleshjack line was launched to meet the needs of gay men.
So what was the inspiration behind the invention of Fleshjack? When Kathy got pregnant with twins at 40 years old, her doctor said no intercourse. It was considered high risk at 40, so they had to be careful to ensure they didn’t lose the pregnancy. Steve looked for masturbation alternatives, but only found options for women – he knew that there was an opportunity to be a pioneer in the male masturbation industry.
Daniel Harvell, Director of Marketing for Fleshlight shared, “Unlike our competitors, our products are made in the USA in Austin and Santa Fe. We’ve perfected our proprietary SuperSkinTM formula over the years – knock off companies have tried to replicate it, but customers can always tell the difference. We provide a high quality product that has propelled us to number one in our industry.”
The Stamina Training Unit, designed to help improve sexual endurance, the Turbo, designed to replicate a blowjob, and the Ice, transparent so you can see the action, are the top selling gay sex toys in the Fleshjack lineup.
With over 15 million units sold, Fleshlight and Fleshjack are a pop-culture sensation. With much of the world staying at home these days, Fleshlight is growing at a rate they’ve never seen before.
Cock Rings
Cock rings. Pleasure rings. C-rings. Penis rings. Whatever you call these devices, they’re the unsung heroes of many a sexcapade.
A cock ring is exactly what it sounds like: a ring-shaped sex toy that goes around a penis or dildo to squeeze the shaft or shaft and balls. So why do people enjoy using cock rings in bed?
The restriction can feel highly pleasurable for some people and can also help make erections feel harder. Erections occur when arteries leading into the penis dilate, making the penis larger than usual, while veins leading away from the penis constrict, trapping the flow of blood. By adding another mode of constriction, cock rings can help even more blood collect in the penis, resulting in more intense erections, boners, hard-ons etc…
This helps explain why people with erectile dysfunction often use cock rings during sexual play, according to the International Society for Sexual Medicine.
Researching the best cock rings?
Our favourite is the Lelo Tor 2, which is a fully rechargeable and waterproof vibrating cock ring. The Tor 2 can be worn with the vibrator on top of your partner’s shaft or below, so depending on your favourite position, you’ll always be able to feel the “buzz below.” There are six settings and the toy is made of silky-smooth silicone.
Vibrating Masturbators
There are a stimulating selection of vibrating masturbators on the market today. The high tech devices elevate pleasure from amplified solo sessions to exhilarating partner play.
The best vibrating masturbators on the market today are powered by rechargeable batteries and last 3-6 hours fully charged. They are also waterproof so can be enjoyed in the shower, bath, pool, lake or tranquil river, if getting wet is your cup of tea.
Thump & Grind by Zero Tolerance is a silicone vibrating masturbator that offers three unique features. You’ll find a heating option that warms the device, adjustable vibration settings and modes and a Turbo Max setting that initiates a powerful thumping device inside the shaft.
F1s Developer Kit Red by Lelo is the world’s first SDK-available sextech platform made in Sweden. Using powerfully intense dual motors, Cruise Control and LELO’s revolutionary SenSonic technology, F1s massages you with deeply satisfying sonic waves for an entirely new, completely mind-blowing solo sexual experience. Or better yet, utilize the free SDK to create your very own sensations and track your progress – and prowess – through the customizable internal sensors.
Manta by Fun Factory is by far one of the top selling gay sex toys in the vibrating masturbator segment. We discovered the luxurious gay toy from Germany is often sold out at adult stores so be warned it can be tricky to get your hands on. Call ahead, it literally flies off the shelves!
The Manta is designed for anyone with a penis, but also really shines as a couples toy. Its ergonomic shape lets you stroke comfortably, and the wand-style design means that the vibration will be turning you on rather than numbing your hand.
Cobra Libre II by Fun Factory is dubbed “the ultimate penis head vibrator.” It features two deep rumbling motors, which cause the soft shell produce an effortless masturbation experience. It’s easy to use with one hand or hands free thanks to 11 movement patterns. A particularly helpful tool for those with physical disabilities.
Prostate Massagers
Prostate massage is the stimulation of the male prostate gland for sexual satisfaction. The prostate takes part in the sexual response cycle, and is essential for the production of semen.
One of the best prostate massagers on the market is Edge by Lovense from Singapore. CEO Dan Liu was inspired to launch the business after being involved in a long-distance relationship.
Liu shared, “This lack of physical intimacy was challenging and it led me to believe that there had to be a better way to maintain that sense of closeness. This ended up sparking a lasting interest in sex-tech and teledildonics.”
Lovense has been manufacturing gay sex toys since 2010. Lovense Edge was the first adjustable prostate massager on the market. The movable top part allows the user to find the right angle and use the toy comfortably. Dual stimulation: prostate and perineum, body-safe medical silicone and a wide range of features make the Lovense Edge unique.
Edge is integrated into the Lovense ecosystem through the Lovense Remote App and supports remote play and sound features, alarm feature, different vibration levels and up to 10 patterns, as well as a deep immersion experience through synchronization with VR and 2D video via Lovense Media Player.
Water Based Lubricant
If it’s your first time using gay sex toys it’s important you only use water based lubricant. Silicone-based lubricants should not be used with silicone-based sex toys, as they can break down the rubber over time.
Sarah Goertzen from Stag Shop explained, “Not only does lube enhance the pleasure when having intercourse but it’s imperative when using gay sex toys. Toy materials are not naturally lubricated so adding lube makes the experience more comfortable. The expression Wetter is Better really rings true when it comes to sex toy play and lube.”
With so many water based lubricants on the market, what makes one brand better than another? Goertzen shared, “The different ingredients that comprise the formula for each lube will offer a different experience. For example, Wicked lube focuses on creating a thicker texture while still being water-based so they use natural ingredients like olive leaf extract and aloe leaf juice.”
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